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Free Crochet Pattern – Plant Purgatory Wall Hanging

Plant Purgatory Wall Hanging - Free Crochet Pattern

The Plant Purgatory Wall Hanging is the perfect thing to stitch up for you or a friend who loves plant more than plants love them. Get the graph version of the crochet pattern free here on this blog post or snag the premium version on Ravelry or Etsy and get the written row pattern along with no ads and an easy-to-follow format!

FAIR WARNING. In this house, we swear friend.

Most of my patterns involve swear words. If swear words offend you, odds are you aren’t going to like Classy Lady Yarnworks or the vibe and that’s alright! Just want to make that clear before you go any further <3 


<<Pin This Free Crochet Wall Hanging Pattern For Later!

Oh hey, just so you know! This post may contain affiliate links. If you click a link and purchase anything, I will receive a small portion of the sale from the seller. There’s ZERO extra cost to you. And don’t worry, I wouldn’t suggest something to you that I wouldn’t suggest to my own family, because that would be shitty and I prefer not to be shitty to people. Thanks for supporting my little business <3 

Let’s face it, just because you love plants, doesn’t automatically mean you have the greenest thumb on the planet…If you or someone you know keeps buying plants just to watch them slowly die on a shelf (like me…) then this is the perfect in-good-humor thing to stitch up 😀

aka The Boring Shit.

Terms / Skill Level

US / Intermediate


Yarn -

Hook -

Notions -

    • Tapestry Needle
    • 12″ Wooden Dowel Rod or rod of some sort for hanging
    • Scissors


Gauge is not particularly important for this piece.


Overall ~10″x16″


beg – beginning

ch – chain

dc – double crochet

long / short leaf – see special stitches

rep – repeat

sc – single crochet

scc – single crochet cluster

sp(s) – space(s)

st(s) – stitch(es)


Special Stitches

Leaf Stitch

The leaf stitch is the decorative border stitch at the bottom of the hanging. There is a short version and a long version.


Long Leaf: ch10, tc in 4th ch from hook, picot, tc in same ch as previous tc, ch3, sl st into same ch as 2 tc, sl st into next 6 ch


Short Leaf: ch7, tc in 4th ch from hook, picot, tc in same ch as previous tc, ch3, sl st into same ch as 2 tc, sl st into next 3 ch

Pattern Notes

Turning ch does not count as first stitch unless otherwise noted

Piece is worked from the bottom up, beginning with the graph section, the bottom border is added separately.

Ch 43, begin graph in second ch from hook

It is recommended to work RS rows in the back loop and WS rows in the front loop, this will help your letters line up better.

Instructions for
Plant Purgatory - A Crochet Wall Hanging
aka The FUN Shit!

Main Graph

Prefer row by row, written instruction?

Per industry standard, the free version of this pattern includes the graph only (along with the border instructions below.) If you prefer written instructions in a row by row format, the premium version is available on Ravelry or Etsy! Thanks so much for supporting my work and therefore my family <3

Pattern Instructions Continued

Bottom Border

Attach C at bottom corner of graph section.

Row 1: ch1, sc across, turn

Row 2: *[(sc, hdc, dc, long leaf, dc, hdc, sc), (sc,hdc, dc, short leaf, dc, hdc, sc)], repeat from * 2 more times, sc, hdc, dc, long leaf, dc, hdc, sc, fasten off.

Pattern Instructions Continued

Finishing Up

This is when I prefer to sew in any tails and block the wall hanging, before starting to incorporate the dowel/hanging rod 🙂 

This spot can be a bit tough to follow along with in text, if you want a picture tutorial you can get the premium version of the pattern on Etsy or Ravelry!




Choose a color. We’re going to create a cord using a simple crocheted chain.


Leave a generous tail at the beginning and end of this piece, it will be used to help secure the cord to the dowel in the final step. I like to leave about 18in.


ch 8, sl st in first ch, ch 38, sl st in 30th ch, ch 38, sl st in 30th ch, fasten off.


You should have a long chain with a loop and a long tail at each end, plus a loop at the center. Attach per instructions below;

  1. At each end of the cord, push center chain thru the loop to create a slip knot. Slip this on to the dowel about 1/2 an inch from the end. Pull taught. Do this on both ends of the dowel.
  2. Thread tail into yarn needle and wrap tightly around the center of the chain loop 3 or 4 times. Thread the needle up thru about 5 or 6 chains on the center chain. Pull taught, but be sure not to scrunch up the chain. If you scrunch it up, just pull the chain from above the needle to straighten it back out. Then run the needle back down the chain towards the dowel and snip. Do this on both ends of the dowel.

Now all that remains is to whip stitch the panel along the top and onto your dowel rod!


I use doubled up yarn in my yarn needle and whip stitch once or twice through each stitch along the top edge. I like to run just one stitch if I’m using a natural branch so it kind of peeks through or two for a plain dowel rod so it DOESN’T show through. Totally your choice though!


Get creative with the color! Use the contrasting color from the lettering or match the body, or fuck convention and use something completely different! Do you friend 🙂


Crochets by Trista - Springtime Crochet Blog Hop

This pattern is being launched as part of the Springtime crochet blog hop with Crochets by Trista!

On launch day (3/13/22) you can get the premium version of the Plant Purgatory wall hanging for free!

Be sure to check back for daily free premium patterns!

Make sure you have the code from the main blog post first, then come back here and head to Ravelry to use the code and get your pattern!

Now share your amazingness with the world!

It brings me great joy to see how you make these patterns your own! 

So please don’t forget to tag @ClassyLadyYarnworks and use #ExpressYourselfWithStitches and #NoDucksGiven when you share pics of your new piece so I and the rest of the community can tell you how fucking awesome you are <3 

You never know, you might just end up featured on one of my channels!

And don't forget to pin this page for later so you can come back to this free crochet wall hanging pattern


<<Don't forget to Pin this Free Plant Lover Wall Hanging Crochet Pattern for later!

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Free Crochet Pattern – Plant Purgatory Wall Hanging

Let’s face it, just because you love plants, doesn’t automatically mean you have the greenest thumb on the planet…If you or someone you know keeps buying plants just to watch them slowly die on a shelf (like me…) then this wall hanging is the perfect in-good-humor free crochet pattern to stitch up 😀

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All Classy Lady Yarnworks patterns are ©2020 by Stephanie Wallick (Wallick Family Enterprises, Inc) and are for your personal use only. You may sell items you personally make by hand from these patterns. Feel free to tag @classyladyyarnworks, share the link to the appropriate post when posting about the item you made or use the social sharing links to share on social media. You may not redistribute this copyrighted content to any website or internet discussion group. Thank you for supporting indie artisans!
Fellow crochet bloggers are welcome to use one photo in roundup/collaboration posts, so long as you provide a link back to the associated blog post. This does not apply to any guest posts, you will need to contact the guest blogger directly. Please let me know when your roundup/collaboration post is live so I can share it on my own social media! Thanks

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Collage of images that represent free printable art perfect for crass people who also love crochet. There are 10 unique designs and most include expletives.

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