I mean people keep saying you should speak your truth. And sometimes…Shit. is a complete sentence. If you agree, this free wall hanging crochet pattern is for you my friend.
When I imagined putting my own personal favorite word on a tapestry (see Fuck.) it only seemed natural that the next pattern be Shit. I like to think that George Carlin would approve…
I hope you’ll enjoy this pattern as much as I enjoyed dreaming it up <3

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Shit. - Free Wall Hanging Crochet Pattern
This is the second design in the “To the Point” Series. This is a super easy and quick pattern to work up. The main body of it is worked as a graph in single crochet stitches.
Top it off with a few decorative rows, slip it on to a 12″ dowel rod and you’re good to go!
Stitch it up in a weekend and you can be telling the world just how you feel in no time!
Or WIP it up for a friend who has a love affair with the word shit. You will be the coolest person they know 😀
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Oh hey, just so you know! This post may contain affiliate links. If you click a link and purchase anything, I will receive a small portion of the sale from the seller. There’s ZERO extra cost to you. And don’t worry, I wouldn’t suggest something to you that I wouldn’t suggest to my own family, because that would be shitty and I prefer not to be shitty to people. Thanks for supporting my little business <3
Need some help in the crochet colorwork arena?
Check out the videos in my YouTube playlist of tutorials for Crochet Colorwork and Graphs
How to Read a Crochet Graph>
Change Colors Fair Isle Method>
You’ll see this called Intarsia in the video, but I have since learned that, after all this time of doing this thing, this method is actually called Fair Isle.
Intarsia is specifically where you would use a separate bobbin for each and every section where the color changes (using the video’s example, the H, I, ! and Background would all have a separate bobbin in Intarsia. Where Fair Isle, the colors are carried across the wrong side of the work.
Change Colors Tapestry Method>
Details
aka The Boring Shit.
Skill Level
Intermediate
Materials
Yarn -
-
- (A) Lion Brand – Comfy Cotton Blend(50% cotton, 50% polyester; 392y/358m; 7oz/200g): Whipped Cream, 1/3 skein/122y
- (B) Lion Brand – Ice Cream Cotton Blend (53% acrylic, 47% cotton; 225y/206m; 3.5oz/100g): Grape, 1/5 skein/25y
Hook -
-
- 4.5mm/#7 – Clover Soft Touch are one of my favorites!

Notions -
-
- Yarn Needle
- 12″ length of 1/2″ dowel rod, preferably a smooth one
- Extra length of yarn in color of choice to create hanger
Gauge
Using US #7 (4.5 mm) and yarn (A) 15 single crochet stitches and 17 rows = 4”
Why gauge? If you want your piece to fit on the 12″ dowel rod, gauge matters. If you are fine with needing to cut a larger/smaller dowel, then it matters less.
Sizes
Finished size of tapestry itself (not including section to hang on dowel rod) – 10″ x 14″
Abbreviations
beg – beginning
ch – chain
dc – double crochet
hdc – half-double crochet
rep – repeat
RS – right side
sc – single crochet
sl st(s) – slip stitch(es)
sp(s) – space(s)
st(s) – stitch(es)
tc – triple crochet
WS – wrong side
Pattern Notes
- Try playing with different size yarn and corresponding hooks to achieve different tapestry sizes, just remember you’ll have to adjust the dowel rod to match
- Ch at beg of row counts as 1st stitch, unless noted otherwise, throughout entire pattern.
- Graph is worked in single crochet.
Special Stitches
- Edge Shell Stitch (ess) – Sk2, 5dc in indicated st or sp, sk2, sc
- Puff Stitch (puff) – yo, insert hook into indicated st/sp, yo and draw up a loop) 5 times, yo, draw through all 11 loops on hook

Crochet Pattern Instructions for
Shit. - A Wall Hanging
aka The FUN Shit!
Graph Section
The actual image of the graph is included with the premium pdf version, available for just $3!
Worked in single crochet.
To begin graph section – Ch 37, 1st stitch of row 1 worked in second ch from hook.
Colors (A) & (B) denoted in Materials>Yarn section at beginning of pattern
← Row 1-10 [Alternating RS/WS, ending with 10th row on WS]: A36
← Row 11 [RS]: A2, B2, A2, B2, A4, B6, A, B2, A3, B2, A, B7, A2
→ Row 12 [WS]: A2, B7, A, B2, A3, B2, A, B6, A4, B2, A2, B2, A2
← Row 13 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A, B2, A7
→ Row 14 [WS]: A7, B2, A, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 15 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A, B2, A7
→ Row 16 [WS]: A7, B2, A, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 17 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A, B2, A7
→ Row 18 [WS]: A7, B2, A, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 19 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A, B2, A7
→ Row 20 [WS]: A7, B2, A, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 21 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B7, A, B7, A2
→ Row 22 [WS]: A2, B7, A, B7, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 23 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A2
→ Row 24 [WS]: A2, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 25 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A2
→ Row 26 [WS]: A2, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 27 [RS]: A6, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A2
→ Row 28 [WS]: A2, B2, A6, B2, A3, B2, A3, B2, A6, B2, A6
← Row 29 [RS]: A3, B8, A, B6, A, B2, A3, B2, A, B7, A2
→ Row 30 [WS]: A2, B7, A, B2, A3, B2, A, B6, A, B8 (you can fasten off now,) A3
← Row 31-40 [Alternating RS/WS, ending with 40th row on WS]: A36, DO NOT FASTEN OFF

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Wall Hanging Pattern Instructions Continued
Top Border
Row 1: ch3 (Does not count as first dc,) 2dc, puff, (3dc, puff) 8 times, dc, turn
Row 2: ch3 (Does not count as first dc,) dc across, turn
Row 3: ch3 (Does not count as first dc,) dc, puff, (3dc, puff) 8 times, 2dc, turn
Row 4: ch8, sl st into first ch, sc in same st as ch 8, (5sc, ch8, sl st in first ch, sc) 5 times, 5sc, ch8, sl st in first ch, fasten off
Bottom Border
Flip work upside down and RS facing
Row 1: ch3 (Does not count as first st,) dc across, turn
Row 2: ch3 (Does not count as first st,) 2dc, puff, (3dc, puff) 8 times, dc, turn
Row 3: ch3 (Does not count as first st,) sc across, turn
Row 4: ch1 (Does not count as first st,) sc, 6 ess, fasten off
Finishing
Hanging Cord
Choose a color, I prefer to use the same color as the background, but you do you. We’re going to create a cord using a simple crocheted chain.
Leave a generous tail at the beginning and end of this piece, it will be used to help secure the cord to the dowel in the final step. I like to leave about 18in.
ch 10, sl st in first ch, ch 70, sl st in tenth ch from hook, fasten off.
You should have a long chain with a loop and a long tail at each end. See 1st photo on Page 8 for visual.
Block
Sew in those ends and then BLOCK IT with the main piece (not including the hanging loops/tube) measuring around 10″ x 14″
I know, I know, blocking is no fun. But blocking can mean the difference between a nice rectangular flat piece and a piece that looks like it belongs in a fun house. Block it damn it! Love you <3
I find that I prefer steam blocking for these pieces, it dries faster. BE CAREFUL with steam if you go with an acrylic yarn, overheating acrylic will “kill it” making it super shiny and drapey (totally a real word right? Right.) Unless, of course, that’s the look you want, then kill away 🙂
These are the mats I use and I love them!
Thread Dowel Rod
Thread the dowel rod through the loops/tube at the top of the piece. You may need to bust out a bit of sandpaper if the dowel is not smooth and the threads catch. Don’t have sandpaper? Try a nail file to at least smooth out the worst spots.
Now high five yourself because you're done my friend!
Share your amazingness with the world!
It brings me great joy to see how you make these patterns your own!
So please don’t forget to tag @ClassyLadyYarnworks and use #ExpressYourselfWithStitches when you share pics of your new piece so I and the rest of the community can tell you how fucking awesome you are <3
You never know, you might just end up featured on one of my channels!
And don't forget to pin this page for later so you can come back to this free crochet pattern whenever you want!

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