
Spring is here and that means it’s time for me to pretend like I can actually keep plants alive again! Hooray! So, of course, I had to dream up a funny crochet planter ‘s apron pattern!
It’s time to get on your knees, grab a tool or two and get a little dirty! If you enjoy a little punny innuendo as much as you enjoy taking care of plants, well this pattern is perfect for you!
FAIR WARNING: A lot of the patterns and things I do involve swear words. This is not for everyone and I get that. Just know that if you continue on this page and through my site, you are going to come across words that may offend some. I do hope you’ll stick around and hang out with us, we’re a pretty fun bunch 🙂

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Let's Get Dirty! - A Crochet Planter Apron Pattern
This crochet apron pattern is stitched up primarily using half-double crochet. It’s a loose stitch to keep from adding too much weight to your body when you’re already liable to be sweating from manual labor…
It was stitched up using the ever-useful Dishie cotton by WeCrochet / Knitpicks. If you’ve never used this yarn, I’ve linked a review below to introduce you to it. This stuff is my favorite 100% cotton yarn to use for just about every utility project and I use it in nearly all of my wall hanging patterns. It’s easy on the hands but also durable!

Dishie Yarn Review
Dishie yarn is a great, affordable 100% cotton yarn that is perfect for many crochet projects! It’s crazy easy on the hands and it’s many colors will have you feeling inspired!
Spring Exclusives 2022 - With Cosy Rosie UK

And I can’t mention dreaming up this pattern without mentioning Cosy Rosie UK. Fiona (the beautiful mind behind Cosy Rosie UK) selected me and this pattern to be featured in her Spring Exclusives 2022 event and I’m just so excited and thankful!
So you can get my pattern by itself OR get yourself a better treat and snag the entire event bundle and get all the patterns for 72c each.
Friend that is 25 patterns for just $18!
It’s a HELLUVA price O.o
And it’s only available at that price for the duration of the event, after which it will return to the still really great price of $34.95 (still just $1.40 per pattern my friend) so head over and get yourself all the goodies right meow!
Or use the other buttons to purchase just my pattern at the special rate on launch day! Head to the “discount code” button to retrieve your code, then come back to this post and continue on to Ravelry or Etsy to purchase!

Purchase the Let's Get Dirty Crochet Planter Apron
To purchase this pattern just click the link below! And scroll down if you’d like a bit more info before you buy! Including a tutorial on the special stitch used in this pattern 🙂
Oh hey, just so you know! This post may contain affiliate links. If you click a link and purchase anything, I will receive a small portion of the sale from the seller. There’s ZERO extra cost to you. And don’t worry, I wouldn’t suggest something to you that I wouldn’t suggest to my own family, because that would be shitty and I prefer not to be shitty to people. Thanks for supporting my little business <3
Crochet Colorowork & Graph Tutorials
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Details
aka The Boring Shit.
Skill Level
Intermediate
Also need basic sewing skills for optional pocket
Terminology
US Terms
Materials
Yarn -
Hook -
-
- Furls Odyssey 5.0 and 6.0 mm
Notions -
-
- Yarn Needle
- Stitch Markers
Gauge
Gauge is not SUPER important for this piece. Though note that if you want the piece to be smaller or larger you could increase or decrease gauge to manipulate the size of the final apron.
13hdc x 11 rows = 4″x4″
Sizes
The main section is about 24″ at the widest and 32″ at the tallest
Abbreviations
beg – beginning
ch – chain
hdc – half-double crochet
rep – repeat
RS – right side
sc – single crochet
sl st(s) – slip stitch(es)
st(s) – stitch(es)
WS – wrong side
Crochet Pattern Notes
-
NOTES:
All parts, including the graph section are worked in hdc.
Both sections of main apron body are worked using the 5mm hook.
Turning ch does not count as a stitch in any part of this pattern.
Don’t be afraid to test and alter the neck strap and tie straps’ length to fit your preferences!
For simplicity sake, the main body section is written entirely in graph format…
–“(Dec) x1” will always be done in color B
–The last 2 rows may seem confusing on the visual graph, but if you follow the written section it may be easier to understand
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